10 on tuesday (22)
- I worry about hurricane season. Thankfully, this year has been pretty good so far. Lots of named storms but nothing that has impacted us. I knew that living so close to the coast in a house I actually own (as much as one owns a house with a 30-year mortgage...make that 29.5 year...) would cause me a little more concern. I know it's "just a house" but so much hard work has gone into it, both to get me here and to whip it into shape.
- Lately I've been worrying a bit about flying. You'd think that since I fly so much I wouldn't get freaked out by that at all. Not so. I'm usually fine and what thoughts I have to the contrary are generally fleeting. I think part of this is because I've had two delayed flights recently due to mechanical issues. And things are going really well in my life right now and so I'd have more to lose if something were to go wrong.
- I worry about my friends. My very imbalanced life lately has me spending too little time with them. Some of them are dealing with some fairly weighty issues/life events. They're all fabulous people who have strength beyond what they know. I know they'll be able to pull it out.
- I worry about my adequacy as a girlfriend. I worry that I won't be able to set aside crap from the past--which would be unfair to him. To us.
- I worry that I'll dislocate a knee again. Because this is such a painful event that has no way of being anticipated, it feels like falling into a dark hole that lacks oxygen if I think about it too much. I try not to think about it.
- I worry that I'll run out of time to have children. Biologically speaking, I'm no spring chicken. And with all the difficulties people around me have had in this area, it freaks me out.
Yeah, that's pretty much it. Sure, there are some random things that come up during the course of the day some days but I really try not to worry. I feel very fortunate that many of the things I used to worry about are no longer concerns--like money and health and school and work (for the most part). But looking at my list is kind of scary. I guess I only sweat the really, really big stuff.