role models

I'm not a super religious person. I was raised that way but I think life events and education have turned me away to some degree. I believe you can be a good person without attending church weekly. I think that how you live your life is more important than that one hour each week. But whatever works for you, that's great. I won't try to steer you in my direction and I like it when you avoid trying to persuade me as well.

So when it came to deciding on who would marry us, I was unsure. I don't have a "go to" religious figure. The Fiance does have a church he fairly regularly attends (and I've frequented a few times) but it's so big that I feel no connection to the minister. And he bashed the election of our current president. In church. Yeah, no connection.

After a bit of thought, some emails, some discussion with The Fiance, and ultimately deciding we didn't want someone we know marrying us via a certificate from the internet, we decided who we wanted. About a year ago (before we were engaged even), we took a day-long marriage preparation course. It was taught by a couple and the husband just happens to be exactly the religious figure we were looking for. I also really like that they teach practical marriage advice. So it seems like we're getting the best of both worlds.

I really liked them a year ago, and last night we joined them for dinner. It was like seeing old friends who didn't really know us very well, if that's possible. We got to tell them a few more details about how we met. We discussed the strengths of our relationship and what we got out of their class. There was talk of what marriage can be like down the road, the ups and downs, parenting. And then we got to share the vision of our wedding and the actual ceremony. We still have to hammer out some of the details but I really couldn't be more pleased with our choice.

While all of that was nice, the best part for me was being able to see our relationship through the eyes of these people who teach folks how to have a successful one. They were very complimentary. They said we were a cute couple, that they were very much anticipating our wedding, and that we just needed to keep doing what we were doing to have a successful relationship. That's pretty awesome. I think, like many things, when you're so involved in something it is helpful to take a step back to fully appreciate it. I think our wedding will be great and our marriage even better.